I've been a victim of self destruction on more than one occasion. Ok, for the sake of truthfulness, more than a thousand occasions. My drug of choice was food: I ate and ate and ate until the only feeling was physical sickness, until the pain of not making the right decisions, or feeling unloved, or knowing that the number of times I can have a Do-Over were becoming more and more limited was eminent. Don't get me wrong, there have been countless occasions when I drank too much or loved the wrong guy too much. I never did hard drugs, but I can understand their allure.
But one of the most valuable lessons I've ever learned is that one can't help anyone find their "rock-bottom."
Rock-bottom is a term used in addiction that means that the addict can't get any lower and can't be any more broken. I've seen several people reach their rock-bottoms and let me tell ya, it ain't pretty. There are several people I know who need to reach the rock-bottoms a little more quickly so they can try to salvage a life for themselves.
Life is not about having the most/best stuff or making a spectacle of oneself on a regular basis (Lord knows I've done this a bit too much in my time) or the like.
It's about making quality human connections. It's about spending time with those you not only love, but genuinely respect. It's about learning everything you can about topics that interest you, even if they don't interest anyone else. It's about not settling for second best. It's about making your own way through life, and about leaving your own unique signature. It's about taking responsibility for your own actions, even if it means taking a long unpleasant look at yourself.
That last one is a doozy, huh? I do this periodically and sometimes I'm proud of the way I've handled myself in any given situation and at other times, not so much. I admit my mistakes, apologize if necessary and move on. I analyze situations over and over for a while and then I set them aside.
You can't change the past, only how you handle things in the future.