Friday, August 10, 2007

Sorry It's Been So Long...

Time has a sneaky way of sneaking away from me. It's been almost 4 months since my last blog and I really don't have a good excuse about why it's been so long.

I went away with my Ya Ya's at the end of June. We all met on a message board about 2 years ago and get together in someone's hometown every summer. 2 years ago we met in Atlanta; last year, we had our gathering in Kalispell, Montana and this year we all met up in Pittsburgh.

Ahhh, Pittsburgh. I'm lovin' this city. Its beauty is quite different from New York's beauty, it is much more rugged, but it is something to behold. My friend, J, and her husband, B, settled in Pittsburgh about 6 years ago after B got a transfer. They have this incredble house; it was built inthe 1880's (At least that's whatI remember), with 8 bedrooms, a maid's staircase and great porch out front with a tiled floor and enough room for a table and chairs and a hammock.

There are about 8 in the core group. Some are SAHM's, some are women with jobs, some have children, some can't have children, almost all of us have been divorced, but there are the chosen few who seemed to get it right the first time. These women have carried me through major surgery, divorce, and depression. They've made me laugh, they've cried with me and they've told me to get the hell over myself when I needed to hear it most. There's not an ounce of bullshit in the whole lot. And after living a lie for so long, it's a welcome change.

In another area of my life...FRU is starting kindergarten in September, which is hard for me. At this moment 5 years, I was so pregnant that I was about to explode and now I'm getting that wee bairn ready for kindergarten. I now know what all of those parents have been complaining about for centuries...where did all the time go? Just a minute ago, I was praying she's sleep through the night so I could get some rest and now I need to buy her some black marbled notebooks and few pencils. It's simply baffling.

Just last night, she marched into my room and declared that she could spell her name. She recited each letter of her name and I have to admit, my knees buckled...just a bit.

I see changes in her everyday. She's more of a child now and less of a baby. She's tall, articulate, stubborn (gee, I wonder from where she got that trait?!?) and sweet. Oh, her sweetness!! She'll look at me when I'm feeling unpretty, or sad, or overwhelmed, or vulnerable and she say, "Mommy, I think you're beautiful!" All of a sudden, after hearing that, things dont' look so gray, so bleak, so...overwhelming.

My child loves me...and life continues to get better and better...

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